Saturday, March 8, 2008

Quite the peculiar phenomenon indeed.

For some reason the number 11 seems to be very popular. Unfortunately it shouldn't be if your own name is tagging along. Now I don't know if this is the byproduct of ignorance or arrogance, but it must stop. Gilbert didn't score 512 goals and 814 assists for 1326 points in 1191 games so you could steal his thunder, Seymour. Let's do a quick comparison shall we?

Gilbert Perrault
  • Tied for 70th for most games played with 1191.
  • Holds franchise record for most goals and points with the Buffalo Sabres.
  • Currently 30th in all-time goals scored.
  • Currently 23rd in all-time assists scored.
  • Currently 26th in all-time points scored.
  • Won the Calder Memorial Trophy in 1970.
  • Won the Lady Byng Memorial Trophy in 1973.
  • Named an NHL Second Team All-Star in 1976 and 1977.
  • Chosen to play in nine All-Star Games in (1970–71, 1971–72, 1973–74, 1974–75, 1976–77, 1977–78, 1978–79, 1979–80, 1983–84).
  • Ranked number 47 on list of the 100 Greatest Hockey Players by The Hockey News.
Dude who uses #11
  • Possibly played some hockey including buying the small plastic sticks at the Sabres store and making a ball out of a sock and duct tape.
  • Has eaten every permutation of the main dish/2 sides combo at the Friday's near the mall.
  • Avid WGR 550 listener and caller who still holds some animosity for Schopp and the Bulldog viciously snubbing his call during the "NHL hall of fame rejection committee"
  • Most likely has adopted some Jim Rome lingo into his vernacular cleverly masking his own shocking lack of nicknames for Omaha and Cleveland.
  • Currently holds four (expired) sneak preview passes to the hilarious Will Farrell comedy "Semi-Pro" that were obtained from some lady's cousin in accounts receivable.
  • Remains distraught about his 1998 divorce from that cunt Kathy.
Clearly my main man Gil is as talented as he is accomplished and deserves the reverence and respect bestowed upon NHL hall of fame inductees and bad motherfuckers in general. If you still have a hard on for the number 11 put it on the side of your 2003 Hyundai Elantra and pretend you are Denny Hamlin. (I had to look that up) Wearing the number may also anger Santiago. For all I know he thinks it's his and won't stop short of a steak knife in the lungs to keep it that way.

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