Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Hide the women and NONGILLOC the doors.

I just don't even know what to say. Nongilloc sounds like either the name of a great leader of a newly discovered nomadic cro-magnon clan or a shitty transformer that never made it past the Hasbro focus groups. As far as the 96, well who the fuck knows? Maybe it's an homage to NHL '96 from EA sports. I hope not- '94 for genesis is the best hockey game ever made and everyone knows it. Possibly it celebrates the glory and the majesty of the '96 Atlanta Olympics. I like to believe it celebrates the fact that humans share 96% of their genetic code with chimpanzees. I believe what we see here is an example of the majestic Slug-fronted North American Hominidae Nongilloc. He exists somewhere in the twilight between man and chimp- living only to slake his simple, primitive thirst with cheap draft beer and mark his territory the only way his brain has yet devised- "customizing" a Sabres jersey. Notice the telltale striping along his elongated fore arm...........................dammit! He slipped away back into the dark primordial mists of the chip strip!

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